How to Defeat Your Demons on the Court, Part I: Excuse-Making

When we feel like we should win, any form of losing – whether it’s a point, game, or set – feels more frustrating. As frustration builds, our insecurities and counterproductive behaviors come to the surface. These behaviors, according to renowned tennis coach and psychologist Dr. Allen Fox, are excuse-making, tanking (self-destruction), and becoming angry/emotional.  

During a match, we may exhibit all three of these behaviors to some extent. Instead of trying to solve all three, we should modify our mental approach based on the behavior that predominates our mindset. Only by dismantling the erroneous beliefs and irrational thoughts that cause counterproductive behaviors can we create a mental roadmap to attain a more winning mindset.

Excuse-making

All players make excuses, but some players seem to do so pathologically. These players lay most of the blame for their losses on variables outside of their control: weather, court conditions, equipment issues, lack of preparation, et cetera. While some of these excuses can be legitimate, there’s nothing productive about fixating on reasons to lose. When players arrive at matches with ready-made excuses, they automatically discount their capacity to change the course of the match.

Excuse-makers commonly blame their opponent’s strategy, personality, or sportsmanship as key reasons for a loss or sub-par effort. The opponent, they say, was not necessarily better but instead played some “illegitimate” tactic that undermined the match. This is inane. The opponent may be a pusher, hack, or lucky SOB. There are no rules in competitive tennis that penalize “cheaper” strategies.

Excuse-making is a tool for insecure tennis players that prefer to deflect responsibility to draw attention away from their own faults. In truth, most excuses are not very believable. No one buys it, so stop selling.

Making excuses after hard losses is not a productive coping method. Even if a player would have won with better weather or equipment, this is unknown and pointless to think about. Thinking like this comes at an enormous cost. To experience growth in tennis, players must be able to ask hard questions of themselves. For instance, How can I change? What can I do differently? Was I wrong to use X strategy? Could I have been more prepared?

 3 Ways to Defeat Excuse-making

If these behaviors sound like you, consider doing the following to improve your mental game.

 1.    Audit yourself. You should regularly review all the parts of the game that are your responsibility so that you never come into a match or scenario with a pre-made excuse.

2.    Practice and strategize more. Eliminate the most common excuse: “I wasn’t prepared.” Do not give yourself reasons to lose. Give yourself reasons to win and reasons why you deserve to win.

3.    Get a second opinion. Make sure you have someone like a coach, parent, or trusted partner that holds you accountable and lets you know when your excuses are unreasonable.